A SMALL MATTER OF SMALL TALK..

I have always been one of those who stay ominously silent when stepping into an elevator. Even when with friends or family, the moment I step into an elevator, I transform into some kind of a stony faced ice sculpture. When flanked by strangers in an elevator, I feel a tad uncomfortable conversing with people, hence strictly responding with monosyllabic words, a nod or a ‘will answer later’ look. I recently read an article which said that Americans are supposed to be the masters of small talk. Well am no American, but still this finding was of no solace to me.

So I finally decided to take matters into my hand. I decided to observe how others have the presence of mind to talk to someone who they barely know from their neighbouring office. Moreover being in an elevator gives you a time limit that you have to strictly adhere to. You will only have a certain amount of time to say something that will make you sound smarter than you actually are and step out feeling great about yourself! Anything contrary to that can make you a living misery and you may step onto your floor telling yourself that you are never ever going talk in front of anything other than a mirror and unless, understandably, you have a loaded gun pointed at your head.

Amongst others, the most popular opening for small talk is ‘Oh My! This time, the summer is bad!’ or ‘The weather is just getting awful’. Especially in this part of the world where the heat is off the charts, the moment you remark about the weather, you can be assured of forming an instant bond with your fellow elevator mates! Other topics may include the traffic and briefly discuss about the congested roads and again very briefly moan about how you are already late for work. But please, oh please, do not overdo it coz you do not want to come across as a bellyacher. This will guarantee both a sympathetic and keen listener. The escalating rent, the local news, sports have also proved to be popular topics for small talk.

Well if you are not a fan of small talk, here is the best option for you! You can either step into the elevator and ask your elevator mate/s – ‘WHICH FLOOR?’, press the button and wait for your floor ( all the while blissfully devoid of the need for small talk ) or take the stairs!

So, happy small talking!

LOOKS THAT COULD KILL!

I had recently bid adieu to my student life. Speaking about my student life, I don’t have anything new to share coz half the student population on graduating have done a brilliant job of describing their college life and friends in teary and emotional words. Yes college life was fun, yes I had a great time hanging out with friends, yes I loved dreaming about bunking class but never mustering the courage to do so, yes I did spend a chunk of my college life in the canteen etc etc. So to save time (both your’s and mine) I will just say I had an ordinary yet smashing five years as a student.

However, I had voluntarily decided to put an end to all those years of eating junk and occasional waves of homesickness by deciding to fly back to my nest – Dubai. So with shoulders drooping with the excess carry on luggage and gold coated dreams, I was greeted by family and friends in a way that befits a hostage let free. To make a long story short and less boring, with the initial excitement dying down, spells of staring at the ceiling and wondering what did happen to Amelia Earhart after all and far too much time orkutting, I found myself pouring over classifieds and soon got a job as an English Editor in a trade publication. I always knew that the work culture here was always different from India. But how different can it get? Turns out very different!!

Step into any office here in Dubai, it need not even be an extremely posh one. You are forgiven for re – reading the name of the company after entering the office and for thinking that you have entered a modelling agency by mistake. People are almost always dressed up so well that you can bet some good money that they might be either getting paid a fortune or might be spending a fortune on clothes with no money to spare. Coming from a college where every student could be spotted wearing oversized kurtas and shredded jeans, I found it next to impossible to effortlessly mingle with these people who swear by Armanio, Ralph Lauren and Gucci designs. Soon I found myself very often in extremely hi profile shopping outlets with names I can’t even pronounce and clothes that have price tags that can even stir the dead. Morning coffee was no longer accompanied by the morning newspaper, but by fashion magazines. Soon my oily T zone, my ‘imperfect’ nose and the teeny tiny birthmark above my right eyebrow started to become my life’s biggest woes!

With your earnings being dwindled away at such a rapid rate, it does not take too long for any person to come right back on track, as I have. I have now learnt that, yes looks do matter but it should not rob you of a peaceful night’s sleep! Nothing is worth all that trouble and by the end of the day, it’s your confidence and attitude that will make you stand out in a crowd of Victoria Beckham, Kate Moss, Penelope Cruz and Aishwarya Rai look-alikes!


So now life is back to being all rosy again..!:)